WORDS: Merab Favorite
PICTURES: Whitney Patton
At the height of COVID-19 in 2020, working mom Katie Becker found herself at a figurative crossroads. Her three-year-old son had a respiratory vulnerability, so to ensure his safety, Katie placed her career on hold and became a stay-at-home mom. In order to earn income, she watched her neighbor’s son too.
A few months into her new career path, she found herself at another crossroads, but this time it was literal. She planned a fun day for the boys at Robinson Preserve in Bradenton. The two toddlers rode their balance bikes along the trails while she followed closely behind. But when the boys came to a fork in the path, they were steadfast in their decisions to travel in opposite directions. The scene played out like a parents’ worst nightmare and concluded with Katie carrying two screaming toddlers and their bikes out of the park while onlookers tried to advert their scrutinizing eyes.
That stressful event gave Katie a new perspective on parenting. During her stint as a stay-at-home mom, Katie joined the board of directors of Parenting Matters as a way to stay connected in the community while serving an organization she was passionate about. Her experience helped open her eyes to the challenges many parents face.
After this event, she reached out to a friend and colleague of hers at Parenting Matters to seek advice on how to handle best some of the situations she was dealing with daily. She needed tools to manage tantrums, help build listening skills, encourage potty training, reduce whining and power struggles, and continue nurturing the boys in a positive environment.
“We know that parenting is often the most important and most difficult job we have, but with Parenting Matters, you don’t have to do it alone,” she said.
The advice she received from her Parenting Educator was life-changing.
“My friend gave me amazing advice and insight and told me I wasn’t doing anything wrong,” said Katie. “She said this is part of typical development. Like me, many families don’t understand what that looks like and might put unrealistic expectations on their children. That was reassuring for me.”
When the former executive of Parenting Matters resigned last year, the Board worked with an outside consultant to launch an executive search, and Katie’s name came to the top of the list. By then, the worst of the pandemic had subsided, and Katie felt it was safe to return to work. She accepted a position as executive director, excited to lead an organization offering her so much guidance in her parenting journey.
About the Organization
Since 1994, Parenting Matters has been embedded in the Bradenton community serving at-risk parents of children with highly qualified Parenting Educators. It is one of 67 national child abuse prevention centers accredited through the National Exchange Club throughout the U.S.
The organization’s purpose is to help each parent understand their children’s development and behaviors. The agency offers parents new, effective skills to help keep their children safe and to help them reach their full potential.
“The way most of us have learned to parent is through our personal experiences, and as our world evolves, our parenting techniques also need to evolve with it,” Katie explained. “Sometimes we do not have the most positive experiences or roadmaps growing up, and we want to change those patterns and learn new techniques.”
With a focus on a positive parenting approach, Parenting Matters gives parents a roadmap to success through five programs: Parent Partner, Chosen Families, Active Parenting, Active Parenting Plus, and Musical Motion.
Agency Programs
Parenting Matters’ largest program, the Parent Partner program, is an in-home, evidence-based program offered in both English and Spanish in Manatee and Sarasota counties that is customized to meet the individual needs of each family. A Parent Educator meets with the family regularly and works with other local organizations to ensure parents have access to vital resources needed to care for their families adequately. This might include a list of food banks, access to mental health counseling, or affordable housing. Some visits are in parks or local libraries to broaden parents’ knowledge base of activities kids like to do that foster bonding and literacy. The program also provides parents with helpful strategies to deal with stressful situations that can sometimes escalate into adverse domestic circumstances.
“Instead of yelling or spanking, Parent Educators work with parents to form a bond with their children as well as create effective communication,” said Katie. “We believe in identifying natural consequences so the child will learn to avoid negative behavior in a way that isn’t hurtful to them.”
Any family with a child under 12 can enter the program. After participating in 24 weekly, hour-long sessions, most parents graduate from the program with improved family relationships, a better understanding of their children, and a new skill set to effectively foster positive behaviors. Overall, this contributes to a more effortless and happier family dynamic.
“When you think about inviting a stranger into your home to give you parenting advice, that can be really intimidating, but our Parenting Educators are amazing,” Katie says. “They enter every situation with an open mind, create a genuine connection with parents, and are skilled at building trust.”
Each family’s assigned Parenting Educator supports them through the process as they challenge themselves to reach their full potential. Through provided strategies, children demonstrate more positive behaviors and better self-esteem, both strong indicators of school success. Parents that go through the program report increased enjoyment of their children, reduced stress, and a better understanding of their child’s behaviors.
The Chosen Families program is a multi-faceted support program specifically for adoptive families in Manatee County. The program aims to develop and sustain safe, secure, and nurturing relationships. The Chosen Families program does this by providing a holistic and customized approach for each family, including case management, parenting education, counseling, educational advocacy, and respite services.
“All of these supports together help families navigate parenting under these special circumstances and help them effectively parent a child who has potentially experienced trauma at a young age,” Katie said.
Active Parenting is a weekly ongoing group parenting session that helps Spanish-speaking families deal with day-to-day parenting issues. Parents, grandparents, and other caregivers meet with professional parenting educators to discuss parenting challenges in a new culture and the parenting concerns and issues common to all, such as communication, family bonding, family safety, literacy, discipline, and temperament.
“We have a close connection to the Spanish-speaking community,” Katie said. “60 per cent of our Parenting Educators are bilingual and can connect with the families personally and culturally.”
Last but not least is the agency’s Musical Motion program, a free learn-and-play class that encourages bonding while developing children’s early learning and literacy skills. Sessions focus on creative activities that enhance brain development and build preschoolers’ social-emotional, language, and motor skills.
“This hour-long class celebrates the parent-child bond and supports it through dance, play, and song,” said Katie. “All in all, we just really help parents bring a sense of peace and joy back to their homes and support parents in becoming the best they can be for their children.”
Wherever one may be on the parenting roadmap, Parenting Matters is here to help navigate that journey. Hence, families can enjoy the ride until they reach their final destination of raising independent humans — which all parents can agree arrives all too quickly.
